Love life: Performance comes from passion

The nicest thing in the world is good for your job and career. Especially in the evening the love life does not only have a positive effect on health and relationship. It's also good for the career. Researchers at Oregon State University found that subjects who enjoyed a private rendezvous in the evening were more motivated, more relaxed the next day, more self-confident, and less easily distracted from work. In short, they did their job better - both men and women. Reason for this are the fortune and binding hormones dopamine or oxytocinwhich are distributed afterwards. Both reduce stress and anxiety and also make you more empathic. That ensures better concentration and driving force. But there are other effects ...

Love life increases professional success
In fact, the impact of a fulfilling love life on professional success can be significant - whether one lives in a homosexual or heterosexual relationship, as a single or in a long-standing marriage.

A fierce flirting makes you creative and happy . Researchers confirm this repeatedly, referring to the so-called endorphins, which the body releases before and after the climax. The high spirits triggered by these happy hormones lasts up to 24 hours and subtly radiates to the environment: Those affected are motivated and at the same time seem more appealing and self-confident to others.
The act itself is even able to normalize blood pressure and reduce stress, as shown by a study by Stuart Brody, professor of psychology at the University of Paisley, Western Scotland.
Also, the more prevalent in men in the blood occurring hormone testosterone shows professional consequences: For example, could the psychologist John Coates of the University of Cambridge in an investigation of 17 traders of the London Stock Exchange, the relationship between financial success and a high testosterone levels prove.

The men gave each morning and afternoon saliva samples. Although successful stores also increased the retailers' testosterone levels, the more astonishing thing was that the best retailers already had a high concentration of testosterone in the blood in the morning. How they came to be, one may imagine ...
Also interesting: people with an active love life live longer on average - among other things, because the risk of developing cancer is lower. Charles Charnetski from Wilkes University was able to determine this.
His colleague David Weeks, a clinical neuropsychologist at the Royal Edinburgh Hospital, in turn, published a study showing that men and women who slept four times a week, on average, ten years younger than they really were.
The love life can also have a negative impact on the career. It is less about the drive and the motivation, rather than the moral suitability.


Time and again people - and especially men - get into the headlines, because they draw attention to themselves through their extravagant love life.

The affairs of Donald Trump, Jeff Besoz or Max Mosley are probably just the tip of the iceberg. For the latter was argued for a long time, whether he could exercise after such a scandal even further the peak office in Formula 1 - he could.

But not always such escapades go well.


Career or love? The profession can become a love killer
A downside must not be ignored: as much as the love life can inspire the profession, so much can the profession paralyze the lust in the sheets .

Especially those people who focus intensely on their job and their career often have problems with their libido. Either because they rarely want or can not anymore.

Above all, this is due to the stress that increases with the career .

Occupational pressure is a real love killer: globalization, frequent flying, time shifts, speeding up work processes and the blurring of work and privacy rob people of their time and leisure . There is hardly any room left for intimacy and tenderness.

And even when it's in bed, love can suffer another kind of career.

The keyword that is increasingly falling in this context is the so-called work-love balance - and this has very similar effects on our lives as an imbalanced work-life balance .

Instead of closing time or on weekends to devote to the partner, the job and standing career in the first place . This can still go well over a short period of time, but in the long term usually becomes a problem.

In the classic case, women first notice that something is wrong in the relationship :

The time together will be less.
They are relocated because an important appointment has come up at work.
After work, the partner is too tired to do something together.
Not to mention physical closeness.
The reaction to it is often reproaches and a sense of devaluation. If both partners continue their behavior unthinkingly, that is a sure path to separation .

This need not be.

Paths to a balanced work-love balance
When couples realize that the relationship is in jeopardy because one or both work too much, the first step is already done. But this must not be the end of the story, in order to have a happy relationship over the long term . Try the following suggestions:

Beautiful experiences instead of reproaches
Positive confirmation works better than constant nagging. It is also understandable, after all, most people are enjoyment-oriented and prefer to deal with things that are fun instead of being reproached. You can take advantage of this principle.

Plan beautiful things together with your partner. If you succeed in making a break from work great , your partner will enjoy it too. So he (or she) slowly but steadily realizes that life is not just work, but also a fulfilling and balanced love life.

Joint lounging
Where we are in the midst of beautiful experiences: If you do not want to plan a big trip or city trip over the weekend, you can make it easy at home. This can have the same effect and cost less effort .

To be thankful
If the weekend or the evening was a complete success, you should be very happy about it. The advantage: you radiate outwards, which makes you more likeable. So relaxation can make you more successful in the presentation or salary negotiation - it does not always have to be overtime that leads to it.

Time for your own wishes
Having a good time together with your partner is nice and important, but at the same time, you should also remember to take your time. Only those who are relaxed can fully engage with their counterparts. This also includes listening to one's own needs and fulfilling wishes.

Professional help
If all this does not help, only the walk to the therapist remains. Successful people often shy away from the help of a psychologist or therapist. In her opinion, this testifies to weakness and lack of assertiveness .

The positive effects professional help can have are undisputed. In the US, it is perfectly normal to mention his therapist in a meaningless conversation. Why not do it here?


Love life and career choice: That's what the job says
The single coach and couple advisor Clemens Beöthy can come up with interesting connections in his book "Why Cooks Kiss Well and Lawyers Are Frequently Cheated". He assumes that the different occupational groups also show different characteristics as lovers . The reason is very simple for him: Anyone who decides to work for a particular profession shares certain qualities with his colleagues. And they also show themselves in the love life.

Obviously, Beöthy knows that his findings can not be one-to-one with anyone who does the job. Nevertheless, there would be a tendency . With 20 years of experience as a couple therapist, he has the following to say about the different occupations:

Finance officials can surprise
In fact, according to Beöthy, tax officials have their own image quite wrong. If they feel safe and have confidence in their partner , they can surprise them very positively.

Bankers are not so careful about morality
Male representatives of the species are ready for side jumps , so Beöthy. Cynics might note that moral flexibility fits well with the image that many bankers have anyway. If there were not the women. They show very strong ideas about loyalty and are very rarely alienated.

Lawyers do not think much of loyalty
Lawyers like to use the term " monogamy" flexibly . Beöthy attributes this to the fact that lawyers are mainly busy in their daily work to find different readings for a cause. Usually the one that suits best. This translates to the private life. Anyone who is used to always looking for and finding a loophole transfers this behavior to the partnership's promise of loyalty.

Chefs devote themselves to their partner
If you work as a chef, you want to make others happy and satisfy cravings . This is not just limited to the dessert. Cooks, according to the therapist, respond to their partner in a very special way.

exceptions prove the rule
In addition, relationships between occupations can work well, which are at first glance somewhat contradictory. It depends on Beöthy, whether both persons have a common, connecting element that can create the relationship.

For example, a social vein or preference for order and systematics can be such an element.

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